“No man is an island.” John Donne
Do you have people in your life who support you and your marriage?
Many wedding ceremonies ask the attending friends and family to promise to support the bride and groom on this new journey. Most everyone agrees.
But do they follow through?
I was thinking about that this week at my semi-annual retreat with a group of fellow entrepreneurial women. We met at a business coaching program about eleven years ago.
At the end of the program, we decided to keep meeting. At first, we focused on business. But as the years have passed, we’ve been supporting each other in life as well.
Many people find support as parents. Asking their friends and family about how to get their children to sleep or help them through the process of potty-training. No question is too personal or strange. And help is forthcoming—sometimes even when it’s not wanted.
In our careers, it’s not unusual to have a mentor or even a business coach to help with clarity and advancement.
Even in trying to find a life partner, we’re often open to advice on our dating profiles or whether we should swipe right on a prospective candidate.
But marriage? It’s often a black hole. Nothing comes in or gets out.
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Somehow after that day when everyone promises to support you and your new partner, it all suddenly becomes too personal or embarrassing. You shut the door and pretend everything is unicorns and roses.
While it’s fine to ask about how to get your kids to pick up after themselves or what to do when they won’t stop crying no matter what you’ve tried, asking about how they handle finances or divide chores is seen as taboo.
But having close friends who care about you and your marriage that you can lean on when things get difficult is just as important. Maybe even more so.
Please note I said you and your marriage, not or.
It’s commonly said that marriage is “hard work”. A lot of that is because you’re trying to do it alone.
While you might find a parenting class or career development program to ease your way, getting support for your marriage is seen as a sign of failure.
Which is why so many couples struggle!!!
The sign of a truly intelligent person is acknowledgment of what they do not know. And most people have no idea of what a solid, loving marriage involves.
And what you don’t know can hurt you.
Having support can make all the difference. So, who do you have in your corner? And how do they have both your back and your marriage’s?
You’ve got this. But if you don’t, I’ve got you. What kind of support could you use? Reach out and I’ll send you a personal response.
