““Biology is the least of what makes someone a mother.” Oprah Winfrey
I loved my dad. He was very intelligent and had three degrees. Sometimes, however, he wasn’t very smart.
He held the opinion that since my mother wasn’t his mother, he didn’t need to do anything for her on Mother’s Day. Even after my mom reminded him that she was the mother of his children and she deserved some recognition, he never honored her.
Was this the reason they got divorced? Not in and of itself. But it was an example of how they didn’t care for each other.
My mother was left feeling unloved and unappreciated every year. Not a great foundation for a successful marriage.
Not every mother enjoys what’s supposed to be a day that celebrates her. Mine certainly dreaded it for years. Even the hand-made cards from her children couldn’t quite remove the sting of my father’s annual dismissal.
How does your wife feel about this day?Â
How Do You Experience Love?
"Where there is love there is life." Mahatma Gandhi I’ve been working with clients around their relationships for more than 25 years. So I often think I’ve heard just about anything and everything. But last week, my client Matt surprised me. He asked—“What does love...
Honesty in Your Marriage is the Best Policy
"People like to say that the conflict is between good and evil. The real conflict is between truth and lies." Miguel Angel Ruiz  Is honesty in a relationship a virtue in and of itself or must it be “rewarded”? This is the question I asked myself after one of my...
Being an Honorable Man in Your Marriage
"Whoever is careless with the truth in small matters cannot be trusted in important affairs." Albert Einstein  Being honorable has to do with people and actions that are honest, fair, and worthy of respect. When you think about how you show up in your marriage, would...
Whatever it is, do you honor her the way she wants? Do you make the effort to make it special?
Or is the effort she makes everyday for your children an expectation that gets minimized as something she’s expected to do?
If she’s like a lot of women, she makes it look easy.
As a mom myself, I can tell you that it isn’t. While pregnancy is “natural”, it takes a toll on a woman’s body. It takes about a year for her body to return to normal after the physical stress of being pregnant.
Then, there’s the actual delivery of your precious bundle. You probably were there during the birth and watched what she went through. But she was doing all the work and experiencing all the pain.
Then there’s all the things that need to be done to keep that child alive and thriving. Not just when they’re young. But for their entire lives. Because she will never stop being a mother.
Yes, you are an active participant. Yes, you both take care of them. So you know how much effort is involved.
Taking one day of the year to celebrate her efforts seems to be the least she deserves.
And making the day about her, the way she would like it to be, is a simple way to show how much you value what she brings to your family.
Don’t be like my father. Definitely be better.
You’ve got this. But if you don’t, I’ve got you. Reach out and share how you will be celebrating the mother of your children.
