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Hurricane-Proof Your Marriage
Another September, another Hurricane. By the time you get this, Hurricane Ian should be dumping a bunch of water on my town. Thank goodness North Carolina will most likely fair much better than Florida has but it’s still going to disrupt things. What does this have to...
Will Your Marriage Survive the Holidays?
Labor Day is over. School is back in session. Halloween is around the corner and the holidays are bearing down. Is your marriage in a strong enough place to weather all of this? Or will you be one of the many couples calling divorce attorneys in the new year? For the...
Should You Be More Honest About the State of Your Marriage?
You’ve probably heard the expression “honesty is the best policy”. You may even claim that honesty is one of your core values. But when it comes to your marriage, do you follow through? If not, why not? Two things have happened this week that have this front and...
Do You Respond Badly to Your Wife’s Criticism?
No one likes criticism. Even if given “constructively”, it hurts. And when it comes from your wife? Even harder. How you respond to it can, and often, does make the situation worse. And this puts your marriage in danger. Yes, she may be exaggerating your actions. Yes,...
Women Shouldn’t Do Anymore Housework this Year
That’s the title of a piece by Sarah Greene Carmichael of Bloomberg Opinion that appeared in my local paper last Saturday. According to her, there should be an Equal Housework Day every August to underline the extra labor women put in at home. Time Magazine had a...
Understanding in Marriage is Overrated
Do you make your wife jump through hoops to get courtesy and compassion from you? If so, you’re putting your marriage in grave danger. I was thinking about this during a session earlier today with my clients Todd and Susan (not their real names). She was hurt when he...
Bad Marriage Advice #25: Forgive and Forget
While forgiveness is both important and necessary for a healthy marriage, it’s not as simple as this expression implies. Forgiveness is a process and cannot be rushed. In addition, it may not be possible or even desirable to “forget” an incident that requires...
Bad Marriage Advice #24: Having a Baby Will Fix Your Marriage
There is so much wrong with this marriage advice, I don’t even know where to start. Frankly, the only reason you should have a baby is because you want one. A baby is a person, not duct tape. A baby is also completely helpless. Dependent on the adults to make sure it...
Bad Marriage Advice #23: Your Partner Should Meet All of Your Needs
If your spouse truly loved you, you wouldn’t need anyone else in your life to fulfill any of your needs. Sounds good, doesn’t it? The two of you wrapped in a bubble of complete bliss and contentment, needing no one or nothing outside of it? Blech!!!! Who comes up with...
Bad Marriage Advice #22: Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater
Betrayal, no matter what kind, is devastating. Many believe infidelity may be the worst form of betrayal. If it has ever happened to you, you know what I mean. But does it have to mean the end of your marriage? Most people think it does. Hence the common advice—once...